Chapter ONE……

Percintaan kami bermula semasa zaman persekolahan. Pada masa itu, ramai beranggapan cinta kami adalah cinta monyet. Mungkin pada pihak yang satu, ia adalah cinta monyet. Walaubagaimanapun, bagi seorang gadis remaja yang pemikirannya sama seperti seorang wanita dewasa, saya beranggapan cinta monyet itu hanya membuang masa. Saya sangat serius dalam setiap perhubungan cinta saya. Saya melihat perhubungan cinta itu perlu berakhir dengan perkahwinan. Saya berharap setiap teman lelaki juga menganggap hubungan kami sangat serius.


Masa berlalu, hubungan kami masih menjadi rahsia pada ibu bapa saya walaupun mereka seperti terhidu adanya hubungan cinta antara saya dan si dia. Setelah menamatkan persekolahan tingkatan 5, saya mempunyai beberapa bulan sebelum keputusan SPM di umumkan. Dalam tempoh masa itu, hubungan kami menjadi semakin serius. Apabila ibu tahu bahawa saya serius dalam hubungan saya, dia terang – terangan mencegah hubungan kami. Pelbagai tohmahan yang dilemparkan terhadap teman lelaki saya. Ada beberapa orang kampung yang cuba menghasut ibu saya dengan memfitnah teman lelaki saya.

Setelah saya berkeras untuk meneruskan hubungan, ayah saya memberi kata dua “putus atau  nikah”. Membuat keputusan itu amat berat buat saya seorang diri. Ini adalah keputusan dua pihak. Saya perlu bincang hal ini  dengan teman lelaki saya. Saya tidak mahu saya bertepuk sebelah tangan atau syok sendiri dalam mencari arah tujuan hubungan kami.

Saya bertemu dengan teman lelaki saya dan minta dia membuat keputusan, dia tergumam dan berfikir panjang. Saya mulai risau, saya sudah menjangkakan yang dia tidak mahu  hubungan kami melangkah ke alam perkahwinan………

Suasana sepi seketika…..

Cloth Diaper

My local made favourite CD


I have promised to review some of my cloth diaper on my previous post. I believe Taurusmom looking forward for this post. Okay I have bought both locally made CD and International CD. For local made CD I prefer qqbaby. QQbaby is a OS pocket CD with adjustable snap. This CD never dissapointed me in term of leak proof since my baby is a heavy wetter. I put mf top soaker over a bamboo soaker for more absobency and it’s last for over 5 to 6 hour. I prefer one size CD since it can be wear until my baby grow-up. This qqbaby CD is very good when it comes to leak proof. Even if the inserts is soaked with urine but still no leak can be seen anywhere. This CD is adjustable and can be wear until your baby is 3 years old depends on the baby weight. But so far I have no major problem with qqbaby cd.

For my International CD will review on my next post. Need to mention that I also bought some pre-luved CD and will review on my next post about buying a pre-luved CD but qqbaby is a new one.

Cloth Diaper

Cloth Diaper


Cloth Diapers is my new obsession. Actually I have been using cloth diaper for my third child Awang Fahmi but not for long because I started CDing him when he is 3 years old. So for my Nor Shaffiya I use Cloth Diaper from birth till now. But recently I share my passion with my auntie and both of us are sooo crazy bout it. Joining Bummiakids Group in fb makes me more crazy with all the CD promotion and sales. I will continue my story about CDing on my next post and will try my best to review some of the CD brands that I have tried.


Online Shopping


This is my baby items that I bought from online shop. Some of the item are pre-luved items and most of it are new. Online shopping is really fun and one of my favourite therapy. Items that I bought for my baby are romper, binder, warmer, baby tights, socks and mittens, and steriliser. Buying things from online is much more cheaper than buy from retail shop. My obsession for baby items make me want to invest in an online biz. Now I have my own facebook page for selling baby items that I called cushiebabybee e-store. It has become my part-time job to fulfilled my leisure time. Hope I can be a successful retailer on the future. Wish me luck.

My Shaffiya Journey

I am out of Breast Milk

Assalamualaikum, from my last post I did mentioned that my baby (or should I say me) having problem with my Breast Milk (not enough supply). This post is the continuance from the previous post. After realizing that my baby really unhappy with my BM supply so I decided to mix BM with Powdered Milk. When she reached 2 months old, still she had  not enough Powdered Milk or Breast Milk. Reviewing my experienced with my previous children, I assume that she has the same necessity with her brother and sisters (Powdered Milk mix with cereal). Maybe a lot of people out there will say WHAT? u gave your baby cereal at this age. Yes actually this matter bothered me so much whether my baby will be ok or not. But I just pray to Allah that nothing will happen to my baby. And now she is 5 months old yet she has no problem with her stomach any more. Hopefully there will be no problems too on the future. So until now she still drink powdered milk + cereal for a true satisfaction.

My Shaffiya Journey

My First month experienced with Shaffiya

It has been months from my last post. And today my baby is almost 5 months. fuhh!!  what a journey. The first week of having a new born baby is the toughest of all. On my first week, my baby had this what we called as Jaundice. Her Billirubin  is 200++ but from my previous experienced if your baby weight 3kg above so 200++ is a safe reading. But still need to struggle so that the result is getting better. So me and my baby need to go to the hospital for daily check-up. Thanks to Allah. Her Bilirubin reading is decreased to 145. So move to the second week I guess, my baby having this symptom that we called “Buntal – buntalan”. She kept on crying on that night since some people said the pain will occur during heavy rain. So on that night I slept with my baby by holding her with a kangaroo style (infant- mother bonding) which I know can reduced the pain she is having (Know this from Gray’s Anatomy) and Waalaaa it’s worked. She slept comfortably ion my chest till morning. The next morning we went to our elderly and ask her to cure my daughter. Syukur Alhamdulillah, using traditional method, my daughter is no longer in pain. During my postnatal month, I tried to fully breastfed my daughter because it is economical and good for your baby immune system. Trying so many medicine including the traditional method but unfortunately it is not going on as I really wanted it to be. I had not enough BM to feed my baby. She will ask to be fed every 30 minutes whereas at that time my breast still not producing any BM. So when she is 1 month old, I surrendered and asked my hubby to buy Powdered Milk  for my little Shafiyya. After feeding her with 4oz of Powdered Milk, she stops crying and sleeping soundlessly.

Pregnancy Journey

My Pregnancy Journey

Hello there, yesterday is my 35th weeks of pregnancy and almost near my due date. I would like to share with all of you my  unforgettable experience on my 18th @ 20th weeks of pregnancy. It happened after we got back from Peninsular Malaysia for our family vacation. On the day that I suppose to report duty after a week of  holiday, there’s a drop of blood during urinating. Because I don’t want to take it for granted on my baby safeness, so I went to the Emergency Room at Hospital Papar. The doctor at Hospital Papar checked and scanned my baby. She said that she can’t visualize my baby heartbeat maybe cause by her old scanner. She also explained to me that she need to do a VE (Vaginal Exam) to make sure that everything is OK, so I agreed  and approved her to do the procedure. After a while (during the VE procedure), she told that I’m already open for 2cm and just waiting for the baby to come out but the possibility that my baby will safe is small. With a shocked face, I ask her whether there is anything that the hospital can do to safe my baby but she said nothing can be done it’s an inevitable miscarriage.

I called my husband ( he’s working at the Hospital) and told him the situation. My husband approached the doctor and trying to get a clarification about the situation, so the doctor explained to him and said that I will be send to Hospital Likas for a dilation procedure. My husband felt like he was about to faint and walked to my bed and ask me whether I want him to be with me in the ambulance. I said no to him because I prefer to be alone at that time.

On our way to the Hospital Likas, I was thinking how am I going to explain to my son (the youngest) because he is the want who really excited to have a baby from his mom. It also had come to my imagination (or you can say hope) that during the dilation procedure my baby still alive and survive. I smiled to myself and said only miracle from Allah can make that happened (never expect anything could happen the way I wish for because the doctor has said the verdict).

So move on to Hospital Likas incident. After the nurse registered me, I was sent to a ward and waited for a doctor to approach me. While waiting, I saw there are four mother waiting to do the dilation procedure. I waited patiently for my turn. When it’s my turn, the doctor (the doctor name is Fahmi same as my son’s name) asked me how many menstrual pad I have used, I reply to him none. He is curious, supposedly I should already been using 2@3 menstrual pad and I assured him that I have not used any menstrual pad yet and still waiting to use it. He asked me furthermore, what the doctor at Hospital Papar said. I replied “as what you can see in the report, the doctor said it’s an inevitable miscarriage which my baby is waiting to get out (miscarriage)”. He smiled and said ” maybe  and this is  only a possibility that he can think of, that it’s already stop”. I smiled to him and said “Hopefully”. Okay we will wait for the specialist and see what he will say about this. Meanwhile he said he need to take my blood for an examination purposes so I nodded to him ( I have nothing to say more) because I’m not interested in doing so since I am in accepting phase.

Later On, the Gynaecologist Specialist came to me and examined me. They also a little bit shocked and insist on rescan procedure for me. In the scanning room, the doctor told me that my baby is doing fine with healthy heart and showed me my baby heartbeat rate which she said it’s a healthy heartbeat rate. I am speechless at that time. I did told her that my cervix OS is open 2cm. She said it’s normal for me to open 2cm because I am bearing my fourth child, it’s not that I am likely a first time mother.  When I heard that I am totally relieved and thankful to Allah for the miracle that Allah has created for me.

And now my baby is almost 3kg and waiting to get out  to see the world. Anyway I forgot to mention that my baby is a girl. Here I present my baby girl 3D picture for all of you to see.